I am not sure if this was the direct inspiration, but Florida State University has essentially done this for years with the Seminole Tribe of Florida. I’m not sure if they’ve directly given money to the tribe, but they at least awarded many honorary degrees, provided scholarships, created a whole museum, and ban anything that offends the tribe.
Overall, Seminoles in Florida have been very supportive of the use of the name. The much larger Seminole Tribe of Oklahoma is generally unsupportive, but they have not taken significant action to stop FSU from using the Seminoles as their name.
"WUHAN INSTITUTE OF VIROLOGY - SCIENCE THAT REPLICATES."
Thank you for this. I needed this, since I'm just finished trying to disentangle the third (3rd) new layer of bureaucracy introduced to us regarding our funding, on the basis that our pro-business light touch regulation government figures the way to reduce waste and expense in public expenditure is to pay Big Euros to a private company to replicate the two things we're *already* doing to satisfy the regulations brought in about "so I see you spent €6 over your annual budget, better have a good explanation and documentation in triplicate to account for that or else we're imposing penalties".
Ah, by contrast a global pandemic? Those were the days of peace and quiet when everything was locked down and we had to shut down our centres for months!
Very entertaining as always, but a couple of aspects of this party hit a little too close to home. I hadn't been aware of the Lower Thames Crossing planning application, which seems like it belongs in Dante's Inferno.
The techno-optimist discussion is also way too real. To be very explicit about it, technology development is a selection process! The reason most technologies are beneficial is that we pick the ones that look good and implement them in ways that will be good, to the best of our ability! You don't get a pass on the question of whether your technology will be good! I guess we have to laugh so that we don't cry. Or maybe we can laugh-cry.
I was at a B&B north of SF a few years ago. Three couples came down to breakfast (ruining the quiet vibe). They were on a coastal biking holiday. I have no idea how the topic of Walmart came up but they were most scathing about such low brow shopping options. Organic produce and meats naturally followed as another worthy topic and the idea of forcing all stores to only carry organic. I can still remember one of them saying, "I know it costs a lot more but that's a sacrifice I'm willing to make."
My point being that if I was told that the above was a *real* account of a real party, I'd believe it.
Looking back, I wish I had said, "Yeah, totally. Let them eat cake, amiright?"
God I love these. Two parts that made me audibly snort:
> You feel like you should say something, but it is an improvement. And you want to stay on her good side, because maybe next time you see her she’ll be a billionaire.
>That’s why we’re working on launching a new spinoff, Stop Paying Attention To The Marvel Cinematic Universe. We just signed our first big contract; Freddie de Boer will be writing 600 articles for us over the next three years.”
“We’re still trying to figure something out. Do you know if sloths are halal?”
Wrong answer! The correct answer is obvious: hire George Church to clone a couple of glyptodonts and woolly mammoths for you, buy a big chunk of prairie land, and create Cretaceous Park for the sloths and glyptodonts and mammoths! Throw in some dire wolves and saber-toothed cats for extra excitement, too. A guaranteed money maker!
Pro tip: don't put a disgruntled, weird guy in charge of all your cyber security and electric fences.
Have you read the novel "Wellness" by Nathan Hill? Highly recommended. The titular company, "Wellness," is just the kind of thing a Bay Area Party attendee would have come up with!
":“I worry this is kind of offensive,” he says, furtively looking around to make sure nobody else can hear. “But I was reading this article about how Hamas dug 350 miles of tunnels under Gaza. Meanwhile, Elon’s Boring Company has only dug about 3 miles of tunnel in its whole corporate existence. So I’m thinking, maybe we forget about the ground sloths and try to poach Hamas’ people. It should be pretty easy; the smart ones have got to be looking for new jobs around now. We change the name to something more culturally appropriate like The Buraj Company. Then we’re back in business!”"
holy shit hahaha. if you're contemplating suicide imagine scott will write another one of these and let that drive you to keep on living.
Let's see... 43,560 square feet per acre, so at $0.10 per square foot per annum, we're talking an annual rent of $435.60 per acre. Per USDA, the average rental cost for irrigated cropland in California was $486/acre in 2023, so in rural parts of the state, the Landulgence people wouldn't be offering much below market rates. Of course, land rents around the Stanford campus would be considerably higher...
>WUHAN INSTITUTE OF VIROLOGY - SCIENCE THAT REPLICATES
I need this t-shirt now!
I probably wrote a couple of those Lower Thames Crossing documents; I worked on it for a year or so back in around 2012.
Never stop with these, please.
I was at that party (the pink and green hair?).... didn't see you there though.
I would honestly pay money for a browser extension that made QR codes clickable in my browser!
"Do you know if sloths are Halal?"
What AI prompt did you use to generate the picture?
Did Scott A. write this? It's pretty funny. I laughed, though only read a bit then came here to comment.
I am not sure if this was the direct inspiration, but Florida State University has essentially done this for years with the Seminole Tribe of Florida. I’m not sure if they’ve directly given money to the tribe, but they at least awarded many honorary degrees, provided scholarships, created a whole museum, and ban anything that offends the tribe.
Overall, Seminoles in Florida have been very supportive of the use of the name. The much larger Seminole Tribe of Oklahoma is generally unsupportive, but they have not taken significant action to stop FSU from using the Seminoles as their name.
I don’t know why people are asking for disclosure of information on aliens, we are clearly living among them!
you’re a loser scott pilgrim
I wish this was funny.
“Hey, how are the giant ground sloths?”
“Lazy,” he sighs.
----
So, so good.
Awesome!
> a clean-cut blonde man
Blond is male. Blonde is female. Or is this a subtle "gender cannot be assumed" joke?
This was great!
Typos & edit suggestions:
- I guess we should have predicted. -> predicted it / predicted that
- pledged give us 10% of his paltry academic income -> pledged to
- then anybody who’s every sat down at a table -> who's ever sat down
- Startup Logo tshirt -> t-shirt
Am I the only one who googled DanielC35801 to see if it’s a real person? The top result is this blog, so I guess not 😀
"WUHAN INSTITUTE OF VIROLOGY - SCIENCE THAT REPLICATES."
Thank you for this. I needed this, since I'm just finished trying to disentangle the third (3rd) new layer of bureaucracy introduced to us regarding our funding, on the basis that our pro-business light touch regulation government figures the way to reduce waste and expense in public expenditure is to pay Big Euros to a private company to replicate the two things we're *already* doing to satisfy the regulations brought in about "so I see you spent €6 over your annual budget, better have a good explanation and documentation in triplicate to account for that or else we're imposing penalties".
Ah, by contrast a global pandemic? Those were the days of peace and quiet when everything was locked down and we had to shut down our centres for months!
Very entertaining as always, but a couple of aspects of this party hit a little too close to home. I hadn't been aware of the Lower Thames Crossing planning application, which seems like it belongs in Dante's Inferno.
The techno-optimist discussion is also way too real. To be very explicit about it, technology development is a selection process! The reason most technologies are beneficial is that we pick the ones that look good and implement them in ways that will be good, to the best of our ability! You don't get a pass on the question of whether your technology will be good! I guess we have to laugh so that we don't cry. Or maybe we can laugh-cry.
Made my day
If the culture of the Bay Area was better known this would make a pretty funny SNL sketch. Maybe top ten.
Top 5?
It’s a low bar.
If people get angry about The Buraj Company, you hire the yeshiva students to dig tunnels! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_York_City_synagogue_tunnel_incident
"Then, having filled his head with wild schemes"
Is "wild" pronounce with two syllables here?
I was at a B&B north of SF a few years ago. Three couples came down to breakfast (ruining the quiet vibe). They were on a coastal biking holiday. I have no idea how the topic of Walmart came up but they were most scathing about such low brow shopping options. Organic produce and meats naturally followed as another worthy topic and the idea of forcing all stores to only carry organic. I can still remember one of them saying, "I know it costs a lot more but that's a sacrifice I'm willing to make."
My point being that if I was told that the above was a *real* account of a real party, I'd believe it.
Looking back, I wish I had said, "Yeah, totally. Let them eat cake, amiright?"
I’d like to see the protagonist totally win at a party one of these days. He’s getting closer though. “Real as an eel” is high level small talk.
“WUHAN INSTITUTE OF VIROLOGY - SCIENCE THAT REPLICATES “
Too soon!
this is the funniest one so far!
This is the kind of high quality content I subscribe for! One of the best Bay Area House Parties yet.
At "Oh, I see! You’re one of those people who thinks technology makes the world worse!", I suspected this would end up in a Tyler Cowen bashing. - The "malaria nets for fishing" inspired by that fine Erik Hoel post? https://www.theintrinsicperspective.com/p/why-is-it-so-hard-to-know-if-youre
"Why is it so hard to know if you're helping? Even sending mosquito bed nets to Africa carries uncertainty" ERIK HOEL JAN 25, 2024
Great piece, but I have to ask:
What are Bob and Ramchandra up to?
I see myself in all of these people despite not liking parties in real life.
I think this is my favorite one so far.
These are getting more and more painful.
Please continue writing them.
These are always a nice change of pace, lol.
God I love these. Two parts that made me audibly snort:
> You feel like you should say something, but it is an improvement. And you want to stay on her good side, because maybe next time you see her she’ll be a billionaire.
>That’s why we’re working on launching a new spinoff, Stop Paying Attention To The Marvel Cinematic Universe. We just signed our first big contract; Freddie de Boer will be writing 600 articles for us over the next three years.”
“What happens to the giant ground sloths?”
“We’re still trying to figure something out. Do you know if sloths are halal?”
Wrong answer! The correct answer is obvious: hire George Church to clone a couple of glyptodonts and woolly mammoths for you, buy a big chunk of prairie land, and create Cretaceous Park for the sloths and glyptodonts and mammoths! Throw in some dire wolves and saber-toothed cats for extra excitement, too. A guaranteed money maker!
Pro tip: don't put a disgruntled, weird guy in charge of all your cyber security and electric fences.
Thanks for the laughs, Scott!
Have you read the novel "Wellness" by Nathan Hill? Highly recommended. The titular company, "Wellness," is just the kind of thing a Bay Area Party attendee would have come up with!
Re: FdB.
Fair play.
Here's (https://imgur.com/B4gZhXJ) a version of the party with a Shrimp Jesus in attendance, there representing the thousands of variants of Him made by AI and posted on Facebook, all in the hope of bringing spirituality to bear on the rampant desolation and insanity of our era. More about Shrimp J here: 404media.co/facebooks-algorithm-is-boosting-ai-spam-that-links-to-ai-generated-ad-laden-click-farms/?utm_source=www.garbageday.email&ut
":“I worry this is kind of offensive,” he says, furtively looking around to make sure nobody else can hear. “But I was reading this article about how Hamas dug 350 miles of tunnels under Gaza. Meanwhile, Elon’s Boring Company has only dug about 3 miles of tunnel in its whole corporate existence. So I’m thinking, maybe we forget about the ground sloths and try to poach Hamas’ people. It should be pretty easy; the smart ones have got to be looking for new jobs around now. We change the name to something more culturally appropriate like The Buraj Company. Then we’re back in business!”"
holy shit hahaha. if you're contemplating suicide imagine scott will write another one of these and let that drive you to keep on living.
Let's see... 43,560 square feet per acre, so at $0.10 per square foot per annum, we're talking an annual rent of $435.60 per acre. Per USDA, the average rental cost for irrigated cropland in California was $486/acre in 2023, so in rural parts of the state, the Landulgence people wouldn't be offering much below market rates. Of course, land rents around the Stanford campus would be considerably higher...
This is the best stand up/sit down humor I have read in a long time. Thanks for the laughs. Converted me to a paid subscriber.